my ticker is a little confusing. yesterday and today it says 17 weeks 6 days. i don’t know if it’s set to the wrong time zone or what. but i’m just saying i’m 18 weeks today. can you believe it?!

i find out june 1 “who” baby bless is. i have to admit i’m nervous about it. everyone knows this will be our last child, and everyone knows how much jerry and i would like to have a daughter, and the boys would like a baby sister. please pray for our attitudes. sigh.

we are going to be getting photopost for life-scrappers. i cannot WAIT. the gallery we use now is just a big pain and i think it deters people more than invites them. we are also looking into other store carts, to see what we can use besides zencart. i might end up sticking with it, but it doesn’t hurt looking, right?

speaking of scrapbooking places, i spent most of NSD weekend at digital candy, a wonderful community with lots of fun…and i found out yesterday they are going to close on the 15th. i’m so sad about this! there are some wonderful designers there and everyone is so sweet and so much fun. for any designers who might stop by here, if you’re interested, life-scrappers has a DT call running right now. for any DC ct members who will be looking for something to do, we have a CT call running as well! if you think life-scrappers would be a good fit for you, we’d love to have you join us!

for those of you who i’m friends with on FB, you may or not have heard about the fanpage i set up. it’s just to help get us noticed more, and also it will share when we are having sales or freebies and such, just like a friends status does. kinda cool, huh?  i also made up a short article-type thing about digiscrapping, for those of you who have no idea what i’m talking about. i posted my NSD layouts on facebook and people were curious about it.

well i was feeling better for a while. not good, but better than i was. then this past sunday something hit me hard and i was back to square one it seemed. i’m feeling a bit better right now, but i’m still not doing as well as i was. sigh. i thought maybe i had strep again, but the culture was negative. who knows what virus i have clinging to me now. please continue to pray for us!

i really need to get a video of jamin just talking - he is so cute. i was looking through old videos of the big boys and feeling guilty that i rarely video jamin. actually i rarely video at all much lately just because i feel horrible. hoping to feel more normal and motherly soon.

speaking of motherly, i hope everyone has a wonderful mothers day weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!

love you all.

How is it possible that my little baby is going to be FIVE YEARS OLD tomorrow? I know I say this with every boy’s birthday…but FIVE YEARS OLD?! That is half a decade. That’s exactly half the years I’ve been married. That is when he’s considered a “big boy” and no longer my baby (although, thankfully, I’m still allowed to call him my baby. *grin*). It’s time for me to decide whether we are going to homeschool him or not. I always “knew” I wanted to, but lately I’ve become more uncertain. I’ve really begun to doubt myself. Can I really homeschool him AND handle Josiah? Even though Josiah is doing amazingly better, he is still quite a handful (I’m sure you have no idea what I’m talking about there, as I haven’t blogged in half a month…so forgive me and just pretend you are following me for a minute), and I don’t know if I can devote enough time to schooling and Josiah too. Plus the cost of homeschooling is freaking me out…I know the Lord will supply if this is what He wants us to do, but the upfront cost is very daunting! I worry about what he would pick up in school on the one hand, as he is a sponge and picks up bad behaviors from everyone at church, but I also wonder if he would do well with another teacher. He is the kind of kid who is very hard to motivate…He’s very similar to how I was as a child (oh who am I kidding - I’m still this way!); hard to motivate, easily discouraged, stubborn, doesn’t listen to his parents well…He seems to listen much better to authority at church. And I’m not saying he’s a disobedient child - he really does want to please us…I think it’s that he doesn’t want to fail, so he doesn’t want to try. That has always been my problem…A discouraged perfectionist, at five years old!!! Anyway, Jerry and I still have a while to pray and talk about it. He is doing a very LOOSE preschool thing with us…meaning he learns things by playing and reading, but we are in no hurry to have him reading books when he gets into kindergarten or anything. He and I went to get his five year portraits taken the other day. I’m going to put a random pic thing in the sidebar so you can see how CUTE they turned out. For some of the pics, he wore my favorite sweater, and for the others, he dressed up as a pirate, and took his new pirate ship with him.

Josiah is now on a gluten-free/casein-free/corn-free diet. YES it is hard. And I mean H.A.R.D. YES it is expensive. And I mean, I don’t know how we are going to do this. BUT IT IS SOOOOO WORTH IT. I have seen amazing results in this boy. He is still rambuncious, still rowdy, still busy, but he is SOOO much more alert, responsive, and thoughtful. He can sit with us for more than a minute, and listen to a story, instead of bounding away every minute. He can do one thing for more than a minute. He is doing much better about staying in his chair at meals (not great yet LOL), and his personality is so much more the REAL JOE that we have always known was in there. The sweet, smart Josiah that we have always been in love with, but knew no one else ever saw. We still have a way to go. We are still looking into a few additional things that may help even more. We are fairly certain he has ADD or ADHD. He has sensory issues, but he is NOT autistic - or if he is, he is so high-functioning, I’m pretty sure he would never be diagnosed.  Same topic, but off the topic of Joe - WHY HAS NO ONE INVENTED A GLUTEN-FREE, CASEIN-FREE CHEESE SUBSTITUTE THAT TASTES GOOD? The only one I found, I bought and it is despised by the boys…I’m not sure how the mozz flavored one will taste…Pizza is their favorite food and it’s so hard not to be able to give it to them. It’s so sad that “dairy-free” or “lactose-free” aren’t enough - it has to be CASEIN-FREE. Which means even goat’s milk is out of the question. :/

Jamin is growing like a weed. He is still just as adorable as ever - in fact, he gets cuter each and every day. No one can resist his charm! He’s getting a little attitude on him though, I’m afraid. We need to nip that in the bud soon! I think it’s because he’s the “baby” and thinks he can get away with things the big boys can’t. Not so, little man! I am trying the GF/CF diet with him too, because he has had chronic diarrhea. I’m actually kind of concerned with the frequency of it lately. Every morning, he wakes up with it literally dripping from his diaper. He isn’t a big eater already, and he just seems so thin to me. Aside from his big old belly that is! Oh have I mentioned his belly button fettish?? He LOVES playing with his button. I have to put him in sleepers at night because his belly button was getting scabbed from him scratching and playing with it so much! (Remember Josiah did that too - he turned his into an “outtie” LOL.)

Well now that I updated everyone on the boys, I thought I’d reassure everyone that I am doing ok. They are 99% sure there was no baby in the sac. When they got my last numbers back of 12 (down from 1477!), he didn’t run the test on the sac because it would be a lot of expense that he didn’t feel we should incur because I was out of the woods. I still haven’t really grieved…I’m still waiting for it to hit me hard. If you think about me, please say a prayer.

Another reason I think I’m kind of in this “suspended animation” mode is that a good friend from high school attemtped suicide on New Year’s day. She is now “improving but not out of the woods”. I haven’t gotten detailed reports on her in a while…When we were told only family was allowed to see her I kind of backed off. Please be in prayer for her too - you can call her “T”.

Last but not least, I want to mention the new Digiscrap Community I started. If any of you are into digiscrapping, or just curious about it, please stop by! Coming up we are having a Brag Book Page Swap (you get free mini kits to make one brag book page, and then everyone involved gets to “swap” each others pages! It costs you nothing at all!) and our second Speed Scrap Crop (you meet on the forum to get “orders” to make a one of a kind page, using your own supplies and photos, with the directions given) - we had so much fun the first time. I really hope to see some of you there. Speaking of the store, tomorrow, in honor of Jeremiah’s 5th birthday, you can get everything in my personal store for $5. That’s nearly 15 dollars worth of kits, when they are at full price (about 8 dollars worth when they are half off, which they are until midnight tonight)!

God bless all of you. ((((HUGS))))!

i am just pitiful.

for those of you who thought we have been on vacation forever…we came back that night. *blush* i am SO sorry that i haven’t posted in so long. i hope you’ll forgive me. some exciting things have been happening, leaving less time for “fun” time.

i am a brand new designer at two stores! can you believe it? it’s really official now! i have been getting things into the stores and getting situated getting to “know” people i’ll be working with. watch the sidebar for direct links to my stores. also, leave me a comment letting me know of your interest if you want a 30% discount as a friend and family member. i’m working on two kits at once right now, and have so many more in the works. i’m selling at Heaven-Sent Scrapbooking & at Scrappin’ out loud!

i’ve been trying to do better at home. it’s not working great, but at least i’m trying.

ok now for some things i’ve been working on (please click on image to see credits):

i know, i know. i said a while back i would never make you follow me again. *blush* but something just really made me want to have my own personal domain again. and it feels great! please rest assured if you already opened an account on the other blog, you are still a user here!

i decided if i have the chance, i want to only make digiscrapped site layouts from now on. and i love this one. i think my boys are pretty amazing.

i’m thinking of making separate sections for each boy, with their own pics and stuff. i’m still considering it though, because it’s hard enough for me to update myself. *giggle*

the boys are doing well, although they are still fearful that the mean dogs will come into our yard, or worse, our house.

we found out the dogs are supposed to be labeled as “vicious” but so far we don’t know what’s come of that. jerry tried to call the owner on wednesday, and left a message. the guy called back, but jerry was given the run-around - someone else came to the phone and said the owner couldn’t speak english well. jerry said to find someone to help interpret and please call him. he hasn’t had a chance to try again, and no one has called back. the vet bill was 100 bucks, and we don’t have that kind of money just lying around, ya know?

jerry gave me a scare last night. he came home to get his meds (he was due to take them at the time he got home - he’d just forgotten to take them with him) and he was feeling really bad. he ended up not going into work because he was worried he’d go into total a-fib. he seems to be doing better today, though still very tired.

oh! and i don’t want to forget this: my dear friend julie honored me with a web award! i love it!

and i am gifting it to my sweet friends keer, carla & amanda. i think they need it this week. ((((((GALS))))))

well, please make sure you let me know you made it over here.

flickr links:

NOTE: the digiscrap pages are public, since they are already seen on digiscrap sites. the photos, however, are friend/family only.
i am working on getting all previous pics up, but got 2007 up already, and will be updating very frequently.

collections: http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/collections/

digiscrap pages (all of them are in specific sets): http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/collections/72157602228023530/

brothers’ pages: http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/sets/72157602246322576/

jeremiah’s pages: http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/sets/72157602253032655/

josiah’s pages: http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/sets/72157602246282676/

jamin’s pages: http://flickr.com/photos/blessedmama/sets/72157602246311976/

hope you enjoy!

i can’t believe jamin is three weeks old already!! time just flies. it doesn’t seem like it’s been that long…

well we didn’t go for the weight check. i never called, and no one ever called us…i did the weigh me with and without him again, and it came out to about 7.5 lbs.

and i am going to find out what vaccs josiah needs and go to the health dept - mom said shots are free there. fyi - when we went to the appt, it was josiah’s first visit there. the new ped had to get my signature on the release form, then fax it to the old ped. then the old ped had to fax his records to the new ped. while we were at the appt wasn’t enough time for them to do this, because the new ped still didn’t have the records by the time the appt was over. that’s why he didn’t get his vaccs.
sorry i haven’t been posting and visiting…i’m still trying to get into the swing of things. i am honestly having some pretty major depression issues…having days that i don’t want to be touched by anyone, or even see anyone. kinda doesn’t work with a newborn and two other lil ones. i hate myself when i’m like that…then there are days that i’m totally detached. i go through the motions but i have no feelings whatsoever. like i don’t feel like i love my husband or my children. no feeling at all there. that is a scary thing. please pray for me. i really don’t want to have to go to a higher dose of anti-depressants…but if this keeps up, i don’t see another option.

i worked on some digiscrapping some yesterday and today…i will post them at the digiscrap blog. i really need to take the pics for jamin’s birth announcement!!

oh before i forget i want to jot this down - i was working on a digiscrap layout yesterday, and jeremiah came over. he just stared at it for a minute. “what do you think?” i asked. stared another minute. “i laugh, i cry.” total deadpan. i burst out laughing - i know he meant “i laughed, i cried” to be a smart aleck…i couldn’t figure out where he’d heard it until today - it’s on harry and his bucket full of dinosaurs.

no, i’m not moving again. but i started a new digiscrap blog, so that hopefully i can keep up with posting layouts i do. it will also be a way for those people who don’t care about my aches and pains and whines, and jsut want to see cuties.

http://blessedmama.wordpress.com/

you DO have to register at wordpress to comment. but i would really love for you to. *bats eyelashes*

love to all.

i apologize - i didn’t realize HOW long it had been until my sister in law mentioned it last night. oops!

i’m 29 weeks today. isn’t that crazy?? still, it seems so close but so far away!!! i would like to note that i’m 165 today…still two lbs under what i was when i started trying to lose weight, back in january of 06. isn’t that amazing? i’m really hoping the weight difference makes a difference with the gestational diabetes. i did a look back to try to figure out what i weighed around this time with josiah’s pregnancy, but i can’t find that i posted it. i was probably too embarrassed.
i took the gestational diabetes test on monday, and am still awaiting the results. i’m trying really hard not to be worried about it…i can’t change anything now, so if i have it again, i’ll just have to deal!! but i still hope i don’t have it!

my little niece turned one on sunday, and we also went to her party. she is sooooo cute. i have to share a pic or two….

and guess what? she’s gonna be a big sister! yep, i’m gonna be an aunt again!! when natalie told jeremiah he was going to get a new cousin, he said “what does that mean?” and she said she had a baby in her belly. and he said “jamin?!” really incredulous. lol. when he finally realized what she meant, he got a little grumpy. i think he’s feeling a bit put-out by all the other kids taking some of his spotlight. but i’m really excited for them!! natalie and i are pregnant together…if only for a few months. reagan and the baby will be about the same distance in age as jeremiah and josiah are.

i have been digiscrapping a LOT. if you go to the gallery, you can see many new layouts in the digiscrap section. i haven’t figured out how to allow comments, tho i know there is a way…

the boys get cuter and smarter and ornerier every day! i can’t believe josiah will be two soon. sigh. he climbed out of his crib last night…so if jerry has time before work today, we are going to put the toddler bed in there for him. he has been wanting to be in a big boy bed for quite a while, so it will be neat for him. he always climbs into jeremiahs bed and covers up. lol.

yesterday i was telling the boys how they are my beautiful boys. jeremiah said “and you’re our beautiful mama!” awww isn’t he sweet?

well i promised a little update, so there it is. i still need to get a new preggo pic of me taken to put up…i have been really bad about that! i don’t think i have one since 23 weeks. i can’t find the tripod, and jerry just doesn’t have lots of time for it…

Week 13

Your Baby’s Development

It’s still fairly early in your pregnancy, but Baby is already capable of quite a lot! If you poke your stomach gently with your finger, she may begin to turn her head toward you; some experts think this may be the beginning of the rooting reflex (looking for a nipple). By now she can put a thumb in her mouth, although her sucking muscles aren’t completely developed yet. And female infants have already accumulated about two million eggs in their ovaries, although this number will naturally drop to one million at birth.

Your baby’s head growth has slowed down; this week, her head makes up about half her body length. By week 21, her head will be about a third the size of her body, and by birth it will only be about a fourth. The fetus, which is now about three inches long and a little more than an ounce in weight, would now fit into your cupped hands.

Here’s what else you can expect this week:

• Tiny ribs will be developing.
• Vocal cords will begin forming.
• Baby’s eyelids will fuse together to protect her delicate eyes.
• Tissues and organs will continue to mature.
• Bone marrow, liver and spleen will be able to produce blood cells now.
• Fingerprints are beginning to form.

Your Development

Welcome to the second trimester, when most women begin to feel much more comfortable than they did in their earlier stages of pregnancy. The side effects of early pregnancy (frequent urination, fatigue, nausea, dizziness) lessen during the second trimester. Your uterus is still small enough so that you can easily go about your daily activities.

At 13 weeks, the uterus starts growing upward into the abdomen, and you may feel some abdominal achiness as the ligaments supporting the uterus stretch. Up until now you may not have gained much weight, but as your baby starts growing rapidly, you’ll see your weight increase respectively.

Even though birth is still months away, your breasts may already have started to make colostrum, the nutrient-rich fluid that will feed Baby for the first few days after birth. As the breasts enlarge, you may notice veins appearing under the skin and the areola enlarging and turning brown. Experts think this darker color around the nipple may be a visual cue for the breastfeeding baby.

You may also start to see the first signs of stretch marks on your abdomen, breasts, hips, or buttocks. (Since stretch marks are partly genetic, you may be able to predict ahead of time whether you’ll experience them or not.) By applying moisturizing creams, you can make your skin more elastic and can help reduce the itchiness that accompanies the development of stretch marks. Creams may also help reduce the severity of the marks, although it’s difficult to prevent them from occurring entirely. The good news is that the marks will be less noticeable after pregnancy, when they’ll probably fade to a more normal skin color.

i was going to post a pic of me, but i haven’t had jerry take one yet and i can’t find the tripod right now. so there will be one soon…

i am out of zofran for maybe a week! i have had an amazingly decent day today, thank the Lord! maybe i am nearing the end of this?! please pray that it’s so!!!
baby bug moves all the time, tho she doesn’t seem to be as active as the boys were, especially josiah. he was crazy! i am constantly reminded of her presence, and it is wonderful.

happy birthday to my baby brother, who is 26 today. my mom can’t believe her baby is 26!!! jeremiah sang happy birthday to him several times. uncle josh got quite a kick out of that.

jeremiah has a cold (about which he says “i’m cold” lol) and asks to blow his boogies. where he got that, i don’t know! oh, tonight after dinner he said the food all went in his mouth. i said, then it went to your belly. then he said and to my butt next? lol! we’ve been reading that book “everyone poops” (because he likes it, not because he needs it - he goes perfectly in the potty all the time), and it says “everyone eats, so everyone poops” so he knows that food turns into poop.

the boys have been so loving to each other today. it really makes taking care of them a joy. i hate it when they fight and grumble with each other.

josiah is so funny. he wanted to try to learn new words today. he learned “wall” and really tried to say “ceiling” but it sounded NOTHING like ceiling. lol. i can’t believe he’s 18 months old. *sob* can you believe jeremiah was only a month older than that when josiah was born?! i can’t. they are so very different. josiah really doesn’t even “get” that i’m pregnant yet. i need to take time to sing to him about being a big brother…and find the i’m a big brother book too…

when i am feeling ok, i’ve been working on digiscrap pages. i thought i’d share a few with you.

these are using pics from jeremiah’s first Christmas and his first birthday. hard to believe he’s almost three, isn’t it?!

what are your thanksgiving plans? i am SO THANKFUL that my husband is going to be off for thanksgiving! i’m so very excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we will be going to my parents’ house. i believe my brother will be the only other family member present. that makes me so sad. i remember when we celebrated thanksgiving with lots of people…

i hope everyone had a great weekend. God bless!